the instruction manual, continued

In all seriousness, though, if we're asking me to tell people how to behave around me, although whatever was in the last post still applies, I think I also...

- am pretty easy-going in terms of being micromanaged or not, as long as directions make plenty of common sense (though I prefer not to be).
- am unable to work when space is too cluttered - if bowl no empty, how can it be filled with things?!?
- am unattracted to snacks, chocolates, candies and your usual distractions.
- am attracted to light, noises, laser beams, and your unusual distractions.
- am more efficient in the morning.
- definitely need some work by myself for the part of me that is introverted.
- don't want to be promoted every year, I'd rather work to understand my tasks well.
- don't care about that raise and title, as long as it's fair relatively to peers.
- still working on my shyness.

If I was asked the same question a year ago, the answer would probably have been different and a lot less candid. In the past year I think I learned more about myself than any other. Sure it was a rough year but I'm even happy with the wrong career decision I made. I learned what it feels like to be in the wrong field for the wrong reasons, as opposed to just simply going out of the comfort zone. It was a mistake that taught me when is it right to flip the effing table and call it quits (e.g. postpone wedding).

And quitting without a job ahead taught me shit that I'd never learn on a safe path. The effect of being self-sufficient on a psychological level. How to not-give-a-fuck, or at least appear not to. Knowing what the bottom looks like makes me less scared of failures. I dabbled in translation, investing and selling real estate, being unemployed, living conjugally, doing nothing, holding out for the right job - all with varying degrees of success but fuck it. It's better than living full of regrets, could-haves and should-haves.

- Whoa. Why so serious.